How to stay true to your feminine energy in a relationship


When staying true to your feminine energy, it’s crucial to know that it isn’t a political statement, a backward step for womanhood, or an admission of any sort. It’s about owning who you are. It’s an important point to make clear, as there are some women who are scared or embarrassed to embrace and show their feminine sides. This isn’t anything to do with the amount of makeup they do or don’t wear, what their wardrobe consists of, or how they style their hair, it’s about accepting the vital energy within them that makes them female.

Needless to say – but we’ll say it anyway – there are as many types of woman in the world as there are ways in which we’re all comfortable expressing ourselves. Bearing this in mind, it’s still true that unless we’ve had particular experiences that have affected the circuitry, there are parts to our being that are almost universal. Some are in fact traits all humans possess, but others are most definitely down to our essence as the female of the species.

As much as you don’t want to hear it, a lot of men like to feel they’re the protectors in their relationship and a lot of women want, as part of the love, to feel protected and safe. There is nothing wrong with this. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable should be viewed as a strength and not a weakness.

Being vulnerable can mean anything from knowing when to ask for help, to knowing when to give your heart to someone fully. It’s rare that people are able to do these things with 100% certainty that their needs will be met and respected, but this is the very nature of letting go and trusting. Allowing the side of you that is unsure, unsteady and maybe even scared, to be witnessed by the lover you trust is a practice that both sexes in the relationship will benefit from. Do away with any fear that it’s an admission of one person being superior and the other inferior. There is a power both in asking and answering a need from a partner.

Most of the time, when people describe a woman as nurturing they’re talking about it in relation to someone else, namely a child or someone who needs their help. Here when we talk about nurturing, it’s about nurturing you. Don’t become so enmeshed in a relationship that you forget what’s needed to take care of yourself, emotionally, physically and mentally. You have to put yourself first in order to be truly effective for anyone else, so tap into the skills you were born with or have acquired along the way and use them.

Female intuition is real and shouldn’t be ignored. Honour any signals you receive in your relationship and don’t be overtaken by thought processes that can get in the way and make you doubt yourself. Even if your outcomes or beliefs are sometimes judged as irrational, hold fast to what your inner voice is telling you. If there is any part of you that feels conflicted or unable to clearly hear your inner voice, then seek some practices outside the relationship to help you.

There are occasions for everyone when it will be confusing, perhaps even when your intuition gets jumbled up with your thoughts, or previous experiences, but you still have to try to separate the two. Master the skill of trusting yourself, learn to live by it and to use it to your advantage. Your relationships will be stronger for it.

Love is who and what you are. Whilst you can be discerning about who and what you share it with, the most effective way to stay in touch with your feminine energy in relationships is to first lavish that love on yourself. Love your body, every curve, every line. Love your mind, your emotions, the complexity and simplicity that enables you to be who you are. Love them more than anyone else ever could. Confidence in these things will make you the most beautiful and irresistible person you can be. Only when a partner dares to match the level of love you have for yourself, is he the one worthy of you.

Writing for Macbeth Matchmaking by Tori Ufondu